Note: This post contains Filipino language and references .
According to legend, the letter you are about to read was found in a trendy bar in Malate (the place to be at the time, if you're in the Philippines) circa mid to late 90's. The pure, unedited version (i.e. comedy gold,) has been one of the most widely circulated emails since then and although it's been more than a decade, it still never fails to make me laugh.
To Marjie,
I am not surprise or wander why Dennis leave you.
Why? What reason you can think about but you're very fat body. I'm
thought before that Dennis only use me to his toy but sooner and later
I'm realize that he really can't not beared or stomached to be with
you anymore because at first, Dennis say he could not stand you're
habit of making pakialam all his walks and always calling to their
house what time he go home or this or that and then he say he get
ashame to met you iether in school or in his family and then asking
you to exercise you're very, very, very fat body but you hate it you
thoughth you're the most prettiest girls he know about what do you
think you are "Beautiful Girl" of Jose Mari Chan even you are
beautiful face (to your think) you do not have the rigth to called me
whatsoever or else different name one time or the other for the real
purposed to insults my personality because I'm never call you names
before iether in front of Dennis or in the backs of Dennis, but if you
start already to calling me different name, I'm don't have any other
choice but to called you other different name to like you are a PIG,
FAT, OBESSED, OVERWIGHT AND UGLY SHAPE girl. Shame to you're body that
is to a BUDING. You can't not blame Dennis for exchanging you to me
because I'm am the more sexier than you when you look to us in the
mirror. I'm repeat again that you are like Ike Lozada when she is a
girl.
FROM: THE SEXIEST GIRL OF D.M.
Ps. You say that I'm the bad breathe
But who is Dennis want to kissed.
Me or you? You or me?
And the final is me.
Well-played, "Sexiest Girl." Thanks for the laughs.
